Never had a drink that I didn't like got a taste of you, threw up all night. (Day 24)

A quick note for Arizona Residents:

On January 5th, my friends from the Bay Area, Bastards of Young (whats not to love about them already, they are named after an awesome Replacements song) are playing a show at the Trunk Space in Phoenix.

They aren't expecting a big turn out, which is unfortunate because these guys are really cool, and the tunes are awesome. Please go check them out, and help support the little guys.

Below is a video of them performing.

Please, go check them out. Consider this a late Christmas/Birthday present. I didn't get much for either days, but it would mean a lot to me. Plus, we could all hang out!



The next few updates will be thematic, just like last weeks travel stories. These updates will be more focused on past relationships.

A good friend of mine is still kind of going through the slings and arrows of a break up, and I feel terrible for them, because this person means a great deal to me and I wish nothing but the best for them, and hope that they can come through this as awesome as they are.

It's weird. Falling in love and breaking up. It seems like when you break up with someone, no matter how much distance you put between you and them, you still carry around the ghost of them. For whatever reason, and that sucks a whole fucking lot.

I used to be so guarded when it came to the girls I was dating. I never put both of my feet in the room, I always seemed to have one foot out the door just to avoid all the pain and heart ache that comes along with the other side of the coin. And when that side of the coin comes up, it can crush you.

The one time I put all my chips on the table I lost everything and then some that I came to the table with.

The one time I didn't have my poker face on, I got took for all I was worth. Like a drunk thats lost a bet, I just glided through life numb for so long after that.

A pal of mine, over at PunkNews recently decided to pull away a bit from the online discussions, which can get pretty rampant at times. As with so many of the decisions males tend to make, theres a female involved, and I won't get into it too much more because I don't want to blow up his spot, but I want him to know I feel for him.

I've never really had that long of relationships. I keep the time frame pretty short because I honestly don't know if I could go through that process of losing someone again. You invest the most valuable asset we as human beings have, and thats your heart. Once thats damaged...Jesus Christ, you feel like theres nothing else in the world left but to drink until your liver crawls out of your throat and goes to Betty Ford.

I know now a lot of the reasons why my relationships didn't work is because while I wanted to be close to them, that lingering fear of one day being ultimately rejected isn't exactly the most appealing aspect of life in general. I'd rather get mauled by a bear, because if I survived...at least I get pain killers, cool scars (chicks dig scars) and eventually that physical pain will dissipate.

Up until recently, the girl I'd previously fallen the hardest for, after our break up I carried her with me everywhere I went, until eventually I wound up on the East Coast searching for myself in the Atlantic.

I saw her not too long ago, and decided not to say anything to her. That dog is currently in a coma, and I really don't feel like waking it from it's slumber. I'd rather run while I've still got the chance.

I suggest everyone run as fast as they can, and don't look back.

But I pushed her so hard, and for that I truly feel sorry. She got more than she bargained with me, and the truth is...I'm a very difficult person to handle in any type of intimate exchange.

My mother has been married a lot of times. This marriage now will stick, and I couldn't be happier, but the thought of going through multiple divorces...multiple break ups...I don't know if thats for me.

For everyone who's going through a lot of Hell right now, I feel for you guys. I truly do.

Tomorrow will be a lot less vague of an update.

Until tomorrow!