Yeah, I'm fucked up and I'm calling you. (Day 186)

Band - Polar Bear Club

Song - Eat Dinner, Bury the Dog and Run (With an added bonus of Hollow Place at the end of Eat Dinner...)

Album - Sometimes Things Just Disappear. It can be hear by clicking on that link, and if somehow you've slept on PBC at all, please go listen to a recorded version of the song posted today. While I really like the energy, and personally can tell how good of a band they are from this video doesn't mean anyone else can. Recorded, you can make out the vocals so much better. But the energy from this video is awesome.



The song is pretty self deprecating, honestly. That's part of its allure to me. I had just started getting into the Polar Bear Club a few months ago, literally to the day/night when things kind of went to the shit for me. So the attachment I've grown to this band over the past few months has been stronger and stronger each time I've listened to them.

Going through their lyrics, and I mean this in the least narcissistic way possible, but the way he's writing songs is the same way I go about it. It's more or less vague without being vague, I don't know.

It's hard for music to actually elicit a visceral reaction from me, most of the time it's burrowing itself deep down, up in them guts. But this punctures where nothing else really can.

I've had a hard time really figuring out who I want to be. All I know is I want this cycle of losing to end, and damn it...I'm really trying. But nothing really seems to work out for me. Just to find or do something to break this repetition. I get angrier quicker, I'm more withdrawn and I just don't care to make any connections anymore. Whats the point? "Sometimes things just disappear", right? So why try to build anything of substance? Even rocks eventually erode, and all that's left is sediment carried away. Pieces of you gone by the wayside.

It's driving me out of my mind.

-Until tomorrow.